I had a profound realization today about myself.
Miles and decades ago, I took a fast ride down PCH1 from Long Beach south, on the back, with a new acquaintance. As we sat on the beach at sunset, this man asked me what my passions were. I had no idea. I was wallowing in a single desire that was not meant to be in my life.
Ever since, however, I have been stuck with the impression that I was not a passionate person. Today proved me so wrong, with multiple life circumstances colliding and bringing an unhealthy kind of passion to the fore of my personality. Not the mega-excited yet content and oh-so-Zen passion that I experience while riding, but the fiery energy that bursts forth at inconvenient times and can damage relationships if left unchecked.
With a “holy shit!” kind of realization, I realize my life’s challenging work is to harness this fiery passion, turn it into what Taijijuan masters term “equanimity” or inner peace, no matter what is happening externally.
Comments and advice welcome.